I thought when I arrived in Pagosa Springs at the beginning July to work as an intern at The SUN, that I was here to pursue my dream of becoming a journalist. I thought I was following my calling to become a writer.
But, alas, I was wrong.
I am not here to reach for the stars or to follow my dreams, but rather, I have been guided by Destiny. Call her Fate, Lady Luck or Mary, mother of God, but I have been guided by the Homemaker of the Universe towards my one true calling — baker. County fair baker, that is.
Yes, I am talking about my recent success at the Archuleta County Fair in the baking category of the Exhibit Hall competitions. I am referring to my sweeping victory in the chocolate bar, chocolate chip cookie and assorted other cake categories. I do mean my triumphant annihilation of all competitors (except the kid who was named grand champion ... but, whatever).
You may say I had an unfair advantage because I competed in the Teen Amateur Division, which gave me a good third of a lifetime on my 12-year-old competitors. But to that I say, “Hogwash! I won fair and square I did.”
To all those who laughed at my repeated attempts in the kitchen to take my trusted and now award-winning recipes to the next level (Mommy, you know who I’m talking to), I present my three, first-place, blue ribbons and my red, Reserved Champion ribbon as evidence that I am destined to bake. I may have mastered but three recipes, but the evidence is there nonetheless. I will whip up a chocolate pecan bar, a white chocolate macadamia nut cookie or a coconut cake any day; just say when, just say where.
Again, I contend that it is irrelevant that I had more than a few years on my competitors and that I have not confirmed that I actually had competitors in each of the sub-categories to which I submitted my darlings. The fact is, ladies and gentlemen, residents of Archuleta County and visitors to Pagosa Springs, I am an award-winning baker. I, henceforth, will abandon my pursuits of higher education, journalistic success and intellectual betterment for a greater cause — bringing better baked goods to the world.
I will sacrifice both my mother’s and grandmother’s clean kitchens, my girlish figure and the blood sugar level of my ever-eager-to-taste-test grandfather to this pursuit — all in the name of baked goods. With great courage, I will make lots of messes and indulge in far too many licks of frosting.
No need to thank me, Archuleta County, for gracing you with my delicious treats. It is my duty, my dharma, and I accept it graciously. For, I know, thanks to Peter Parker’s Uncle Ben, that with great power, comes great responsibility. Fear not, I will use my new found powers well — beginning with my enjoyment of this fresh from the oven, just-golden brown, sweet, rich and buttery, white chocolate macadamia nut cookie.
Mmmmm ...award-winning goodness.