Bookmark and Share

Big boy’s toys — just a bigger price!

As soon as “The truck is too big” article came out, I received several replies. It hit a nerve with several people.

I thought I was the grownup here; apparently I am the old one here.

This is from Sam:

“Betty, Betty, Betty, TOO OLD? TOO OLD? TOO OLD? Our boy toys are NEVER too big; and we are never too old for new and bigger toys. If I could afford it, I’d have me another plane and just fly the wings off of it. I have a neighbor who is leaving next month to travel to Alaska on his monster motorcycle, he is 75 and I don’t think I’ll tell him his motorcycle is too BIG, or he is too old. Hang in there, Al Love your column!”

A neighbor said: “Ease up Betty, don’t be so hard on Al.”

A co-worker at Ace asked our daughter if her Dad drove a big silver grey truck.

Our daughter said, “Yes.”

She said, “I thought so, I watched him go back and forth, up and back in the parking lot for ten minutes trying to park. Tell your mother, I agree, the truck is too big for your Dad.”

Everyone has an opinion. So here goes, to all the grownup boys with their big toys and big price tags.

Al’s brother calls the same day, leaves a message on the machine. “Al, lay off the butter. And it would do well for Betty to lay off the butter too.”

It will do well for Betty to lay off the butter too?

These were fighting words. I’ve known Al’s brother, David, 51 years. We decided a long time ago we needed to love each other for Al’s sake, so we do. We live in different worlds, sweet Al is our only common ground.

When Al’s brother called back later, I told him I wrote about him and his 30-year-old girlfriends, and called them his big boy toys. I also reminded him he turned 78 this month.

He said he just got back from the gym.

I said, “I guess with those thirty-year-olds, if they see you without clothes, you would do well to go to the gym.”

“It’s not that. It’s rigorous, dating these young girls. I’ve got to stay in shape; they take a lot of energy.”

Then, he laughed. “I had a date with Caroline the other night. She is twenty-two. Her boyfriend got mad and I was going to have to beat him up.”

“Realllly! And he was scared of you? Oh my, the price of big boy toys!”

Al’s brother said “I’ll send a picture of Caroline; she is a knockout, except Al doesn’t know how to retrieve pictures from his phone. Maybe your daughter can retrieve it for him.”

“I know,” I said, “His phone is too big for him too. Back to this girl, do you realize you are dating someone the same age as our granddaughter? She could be your granddaughter.”

“So why in the world is a twenty-two -year-old dating a seventy-eight-year-old man?” I asked him.

“It’s because I know how to treat these girls. These young bucks don’t treat them right.”

My son-in-law says, “It’s his money!”

My daughter says “It’s his charisma!”

I say, “What in the world do they talk about? It’s ridiculous.”

David says, “I don’t do anything, they just start flirting with me.”

Al says, “It’s true. He walks in the door, women’s heads turn. He doesn’t encourage them. They fall all over him.”

David tells me, “I’m bringing a girlfriend this weekend to Pagosa. Betty, don’t get religious with her.”

I cock my eye, lift my eyebrow and think, “Oh me. I’m too old for all this nonsense.”

So you see, everyone is in his own world and apparently doesn’t mind paying for his toys. Al likes his big truck and his brother likes his young girlfriends. Everyone has their toys and I have my stories and I love writing them. I know you think I’m making this stuff up, I’m not! If I’m lying, I’m dying!

Final Brushstroke: Everyone has their toys. But, oh, the price we pay for those toys.

Artist Quote

“Everyone is like a magnet. You attract to yourself reflections of that which you are. If you’re friendly, then everybody else seems to be friendly too.” — Dr. David Hawkins, physician and lecturer.

Reader’s Comments

Please send your comments to See my work on and read other articles from the Artist’s Lane on Coming shortly, The Mysterious Life of Mary Magdalene.

blog comments powered by Disqus